...or that...an update

my interview yesterday went really well, although it was a bit weird because it was a group interview. they said they'd let me know by tuesday.

and the interview today went so well that they offered me the job on the spot. i told them that i was waiting to hear about another offer, and they still said that they would like me to come in on tuesday on a temporary/part-time basis. if i work out, they'll bump it up to full time and a higher pay range. why am i hesitant? because this is the job on long island.

i'm not going to lie, i do need the money. but i still want to hold on in case some of the other places i've applied (blue man group, the public theater) call me. what do i do? take the job but give it a while before i settle in? i don't want to leave these guys hanging, but it also seems like they need someone pretty immediately. and the money can't hurt, right? but still...it's LONG ISLAND.

this or that...

i have two job interviews in the next two days. this is what i want and need...so why am i so apprehensive?

neither position is ideal. one would require commuting to long island and the other is with a festival; so the position isn't permanent.

i guess i'm just scared that i'll accept something and miss my golden opportunity or something.

bunny pirate!

yesterday while i was walking up bedford avenue, i noticed a commotion going on across the street. i took my earphones out to hear what was going on and then noticed that a man was hopping down the sidewalk and shouting "i'm bunny pirate!" to groups of people.
he was wearing the head piece from an easter bunny outfit, an eye patch, red sweatpants with novelty boxers over it (the boxers had a plastic ass attached to the back), and an american flag as a cape. on one hand he had a blue boxing glove; in the other he had a giant floppy heart on a stick.
i was more than amused and watched him accost groups of people trying to ignore him. if i was with someone, i may have risked letting him hop up to me just to see what he'd do. but, unfortunately, i was on my way somewhere and didn't want to risk it.
then today, i saw these posters up on the light poles!



some days i REALLY love my neighborhood!

essay

i'm applying for a job at...well, i don't want to jinx it, but anyway, it's a place i've always wanted to work for. and they want me to write a 500 word essay on my goals, experience and education and how it has helped me thus far.

i haven't had to write an essay since 2002. i haven't had to write an essay about myself since i applied to colleges...last century. a history paper is easy. you have themes, events you can talk about. but an essay about yourself is fucking hard.

and it's for a finance position, anyway. i don't expect i'd be writing a lot of essays in between doing the reconciliation reports and doing the theater payroll.

i mean, all i really want to say is that i just want a paying, theater related job that is stable and pays me enough so that i won't have to skip meals. but somehow i don't think they'd go for that.

i think it's time for a break from the job search.

coney island/bouncing souls

yesterday hatim and i went down to coney island to see the bouncing souls.

i’ve been a fan of their’s for a long time, but never had a chance to see them live. all six nights they played at the knitting factory last year were sold out the week they went on sale (or something ridiculous like that). but it was worth the wait. i couldn’t have asked for a better first time seeing a band.

our tickets included a "fun pass" that would allow us to ride the rides at astroland for free. the weather was kind of threatening, so alot of the rides were shutting down for fear of rain. they gave us $10 of our tickets back to us, so we went around spending it on what we could. we rode the wonderwheel and dante’s inferno and played a lot of skee ball. then we walked around on the beach and boardwalk. i wanted to see the freak show, but both that and the coney island museum were closed because it was monday. i did notice and think it was odd that in the same building that housed the coney museum and freak show had an army recruiting office in it.




i didn’t mind that a lot of the things were closed. it gave us a more interesting perspective. the weather set a very different kind of mood for the trip. it started getting colder and after a while we saw all that was open, so we ate some questionable food at ruby’s bar and grill, next door to cha cha’s, where we would be seeing the concert.



after a while we didn’t know what else to do besides go to cha cha's and start drinking. and drink i did. we tried the coney island ale that tasted like real carney! and nothing says class like plastic cups.







the first band to go on was static radio nj. i noticed that the drummer was a guy i accidentally hit in the crotch earlier that evening with a bar stool. heh. they were alright, not really my thing though. then another band was supposed to play. i wasn't really paying attention when the next band went on. but as they started to play, i turned to hatim and said "who are these guys? they sound like the bouncing souls." and he said "they are the bouncing souls you moron."


we pushed forward so i could actually see the stage and i ended up on the edge of the mosh pit pushing people back in. after that, it's all kind of a blur. i couldn't tell you everything that was played, but i know i heard the majority of everything i could have wanted to hear. i was in the pit, on the side...at one point hatim and i got separated and i ended up in the front row. i got to pound fists with the bassist, bryan, and there was some guy...my bouncing soul mate (haha)...who kept an eye on me and more than once kept me from getting trampled or knocked over. i tried to find him after the show to say thanks, but i didn't know where he went.


after the show, hatim and i were dripping with our sweat, other people's sweat, and beer. i was glowing. the crowd was disbursing, but i didn't want to leave. i had another beer and this guy that i had been talking to earlier...a bar regular went up to pete, the guitarist and told him i wanted to take a picture with him. it was awesome.



when i got home, i surveyed the damage. my white shoes are now black. i'm going to try throwing them in the washer to see if they get any better. hatim and i both stank of sweat and beer. this morning the shirt i bought at the merch table was still wet. i've got bruises forming on both forearms and i have difficulty putting weight on my right ankle. my body hurts, but i'm still giggling about last night. this blog entry just doesn't do it justice. yesterday was one of the best days i've had for a long, long time and i'm still basking in that happiness. and even though i know it won't be like my first time, i can't wait to see these guys play again.

the book i am...

interesting...

You're Mrs. Dalloway!

by Virginia Woolf

Your life seems utterly bland and normal to the casual observer, but
inside you are churning with a million tensions and worries. The company you surround
yourself with may be shallow, but their effects upon your reality are tremendously deep.
To stay above water, you must try to act like nothing's wrong, but you know that the
truth is catching up with you. You're not crazy, you're just a little unwell. But no
doctor can help you now.


Take the Book Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

job offer

when jeromy and i were discussing my leaving rci and working at ha!, he gave me this speech about how one thing leads to another and who knows where working at ha! would lead me. i know he felt bad about telling me i was losing my job, but i also kind of do believe it. i really do believe everything happens for a reason.

and now as my time at ha! comes to a close, i was beginning to think that my working there was just a waste of time. that nothing has come out of it besides making my resume look a little more interesting...then glenn walked in to ha! today. he rented the sound equipment and did the sound and lighting design for don't quit. he and i got along quite well during the limited contact we had.

well, he offered me a job today in his office. he said it could be part time and we didn't really discuss the specifics because my boss walked up. but the draw back i'd have to travel somewhere on long island. he and i exchanged numbers and the more i think about it, the more i think i should call him. i initially was just going to pass it off, but it could lead to something. and it is money. it would just have to be enough money to make my traveling on the lirr worth it. regardless, i should call him and get more info...

so should i call him tomorrow or should i wait a day and call him wednesday?

who would have thought the theater girl who has never run a light board could end up working in a light/sound design/rental office???

dead head

it's been quite a while since i've remembered a dream of mine...until last night. and last night's was crazy.

the first part of my dream that i remember is that there were a whole bunch of us in some institutional type building, like a high school or something. it was a hostage situation and we were all in different rooms, with a gun man walking the halls and checking in on us. we had all been given tasks to do and everyone was doing them except this one guy, who i think had just given up and he was being very loud about not doing what he was told. the gunman shot at him, but didn't hit him. i don't know why he didn't kill him.

in his rage the gunman came over to my room and started yelling at me. i got down on the floor with my hands over the back of my head. i was laying face down. then i heard and felt him shoot me. things got black and kind of fuzzy, but i knew he shot me and that i was dead. then i began to question whether or not i was dead because i was still conscious. i got up and it took me a while to figure out to see. i started to panic because i thought that i must definitely be alive and just brain damaged. but after a while i figured out how i could see. then i touched my forehead and felt the exit wound. i was dead. and a ghost. but i could still feel pain. i was conscious of the pain in my head throughout the entire dream.

this is where the rest of the dream gets choppy...i went out to find my friends so they could help me figure out why i was still around. of the people i spoke with, only one i recognized from real life, and that was bob. some of them could see me and some of them couldn't. sometimes people who didn't even know me could see me and interact with me, some without realizing that i was a ghost. at one point during the dream i was at a parking garage in the east village trying to convince the guy to let me park my car there because i had a regular spot that had expired. we argued for a while and then i walked away and bob handled it. then the guy asked bob if i was alright because i had a bit of blood on my forehead. that was when it dawned on me that my head wound that i always felt might be visible to everyone. it was, but i guess just in different degrees. bob said he saw the whole extent of it. and when i put my hands up to touch it, it was there as if it were a fresh wound. but others only saw aspects of it. i remember wishing multiple times in the dream that i had died some other way and that my wound wasn't always visible and the pain it caused as constant.

we were trying to figure out why i was sticking around, why i hadn't passed on to where ever. one theory was due to the violence of my death and another was that i had unfinished business. but when thinking about that, i had no idea what that business could be. the search took us to some older man. i was hoping that he didn't see me and for a while he was acting like he didn't. he invited my friends in for some food in his little back yard garden. i was hanging off to the side until he looked right at me and offered me a seat near him. i was shocked.

and that's all i remember of my dream. crazy, right? anyone have any insight? i tried looking up some of the stuff online, but i'm not finding a lot.